32 flavours and then some

i’m a music snob. i like things done my way and don’t bend easily to other people’s preferences. corporate worship for me (is that an oxymoron already?) often seems loud, hollow, brash, repetitive, devoid of theology, grace, reverence, awe and fodder for my mind to feed on.

and so i sit - the silent one in the noise; the monk at the rock concert. i appreciate the music - the skill of the musicians; the wonder of syncopation - and so i’m somehow able to worship; but indirectly - in spite of, rather than because of, the style adopted.

there has to be more!

i’m hungry for silence, liturgy, reflection, chanting, incense, meditation, not as an end in itself, or even a permanent alternative, but simply as a counter-balance to all this incessant, insipid jangling.

when we are stuck within the tight confines of our own tradition, when we fail to look outside for inspiration and guidance, i am convinced this is the inevitable result. for those reared in high church circles drums, guitars, spontaneity, hands-in-the-air-for-the-rousing-last-chorus type praise can be an overwhelmingly liberative experience. to hear someone pray straight from their heart, out loud, can be as fresh as a kiss. but likewise, for those of us all-too-familiar with incoherent, rambling prayers, culminating in sentences such as “so anyway, happy birthday jesus” it can be profoundly moving to be part of a community orating together :

“we do not presume to come to this thy table, o merciful lord, trusting in our own righteousness, but in thy manifold and great mercies. we are not worthy so much as to gather up the crumbs under thy table. but thou art the same lord whose property is always to have mercy. grant us therefore, gracious lord, so to eat the flesh of thy dear son jesus christ, and to drink his blood, that we may evermore dwell in him, and he in us.”

we need to humble ourselves and look to our ancient (common) history and to each other - catholics need the anabaptists, who need the methodists, who need the presbyterians, who need the charismatics, who need the orthodox, who need the evangelicals, who need the liberals…

after a while, even my favourite flavour of ice-cream becomes completely sickening.

Comments

[caroline]

amen.

i love learning from other traditions. st michaels church in chester was my first real experience of the anglican church and even though it's not especially traditional i still had a real shock when i was thrown into a different way of worshipping.- i'd go to the wrong part of the altar to receive communion and only just find my place in the prayers by the time they got to the last line! after my initial childish contempt i was able to appreciate the richness of the words, the structure and the relative reverence with which we entered into god's throne room. i'm so thankful for the opportunity to experience different styles of worship.

i recently spent a few days on a retreat with the northumbria community (http://www.northumbriacommunity.org/) and was blown away by the way god met with me as i sat in silence freezing my arse off in a tiny little chapel four times a day. the whole monastic lifestyle isn't for me (i ended up driving 20 miles in search of some galaxy chocolate) but drawing upon their liturgy and meditations and practices has introduced me to a new way of meeting with my jesus.